So, I swore to myself (and you dear reader) that I wasn't going to give this "issue" any more screen time than it deserved. Well...apparently it deserves just a bit more.
Those of you who have been faithfully following my blog are aware that LeAnn and Kris Davis (mother and son) have most recently made their bigotry known. Apparently, however, only to be known by me (and my mother and two sisters). When confronted by others who ask the right questions...the story...might get a bit skewed. Allow me to clarify.
About a month ago, on my way home from work on Sunday, I received a phone call from my sister Jen. She was obviously upset, and proceeded to let me know that Kris and LeAnn made it clear to everyone (except me of course) that I was NOT invited to Kris's impending nuptials. Kris hadn't worked up the guts to tell me himself...yet. It was her way of giving me a heads up.
Now, there is some disagreement within my family about whether Jen should have done this or not. Well, it's done. She did. So, deal. Thank you Jen. I understand the motivation behind the rest of you not telling me (the idea being that Kris should have that burden) but it just doesn't matter. Later on, that same evening, Kris found the balls to give me a call. Know this...Jen giving me a heads up did nothing to change the conversation that took place.
That conversation is recreated here VERBATIM!
Kris: Hey, John?
Sara: It's Sara...but go ahead.
Kris: Well...I just wanted to let you know that you're not invited to the wedding.
Sara: That's fine I wouldn't want to come anyway.
Kris: Well...that makes things easier... Sara: Goodbye.
That's it. The entire conversation. Now, should you confront Kris, you might hear a different story. One in which he tells me I could come to the wedding as long as I wore a suit. A nice woman's suit, of course, but no dress. While I'm going to leave the hypocritical bigotry of that statement alone...for now...it simply wasn't made. It's a fiction. A lie.
That night a line was drawn. NOT by me. A line that I am inexorably on one side of. I will tell you this...I am PROUD to be there. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else but comfortable with me. The fact that Kris sees fit to change his story when confronted by those who find his actions offensive, says that he is NOT comfortable with himself. Have the courage to stand by your convictions...regardless of how asinine they may be.
Now, to the point. Should the fiction that Kris has created in his mind have been true...know this...MY ANSWER WOULD HAVE BEEN THE SAME. Now I could launch into a lengthy post on bigotry and transsexuality...but wait...I already have.
More recently, Nick has entered into the fray with this little exchange...
Found on my sister Jen's Facebook page. For those of you who are not her friends on Facebook...here is the exchange reproduced...
Posted on Friday, August 13th
Jen: Girls night tonight. Just me and my girls! Can't wait! Woo hoo!
Nick: Too bad you couldn't make it to the wedding.
Jen: Yeah. And it's too bad Sara couldn't be there too.
Nick: That's a situation only between Kris and John the rest of us need to stay out of it, is that the reason why you didn't come to the wedding.
To some, this situation may seem "complicated". Allow me to simplify. Ask yourself this, faithful reader, if someone you cared deeply about (a spouse, child, parent, lover, friend) was excluded from an activity that you had been invited to because they didn't fit the mold of what the host considered worthy...would you continue to go without them? Not fair you might say...well you're right...it's not. But, it is the truth. Life is full of examples of infamous fence sitters, hedgers, avoiders and their like. None of them fair very well. They are not remembered in a positive light. History is made by those that stand, firm and public, in their convictions.
There is no gray area here. Kris, and LeAnn, have seen to that. You either agree with them or you don't. You either support them or you don't. But, unless you make that known...then you can be claimed by anyone. You are owned by whichever side chooses you as theirs. Until you make your stand known...you haven't made one.
I think that Yoda said it best...
"Do or do not. There is no try."
Should you see fit...you may voice your opinion publicly in the comments section here, or on Facebook, or on my sisters Facebook (should you have that permission). I would encourage you to do so...because a voice unheard is a voice uncounted.
With that in mind...allow me to make this affirmation publicly. From this day on LeAnn, Kris, and Nick will never see or hear from me again. I do not need people in my life that are mean, bigoted, ignorant, and a complete waste of my time. I have two sisters whom I believe love me dearly, and a mother whom I'm sure believes she feels the same. My father, when he was/is here, made it clear that he loved me...and that is how I will always remember him. I have quite a few friends, some clearly closer to me than others, and literally thousands of students who have voiced their high opinions of me both privately and publicly. And, most important, I have a daughter who loves me more than anyone else is capable of loving me. And, I love her too...coast to coast. And THAT is why I don't need them...or anyone who thinks like them.
Sara Jade Woodhouse
P.S. If you haven't started following my blog yet...now might be the time...I have a feeling things are just going to get more interesting from here. Also, this is the last time I will address this event.